In hand grenades and horseshoes, that’s the only place that close counts, or so the saying goes. I watched four games today on my TV and the other four on my Blackberry, watching the scores tick by at 30 second intervals. Even without access to the live action, I could tell that today’s games were the closest we have seen so far. That wasn’t true in every case, of course.
We were like grasshoppers in their sight. I have decided that picking a school sporting a man’s full name is always a bad idea. Steve F. Austin literally looked like midgets compared to the orange giants of Syracuse. Eric Bell, all 61 inches of him, looked like Mighty Mouse running around out there. They might as well have been mice, the way they were mercilessly exterminated.
Remember what I said about Pittsburgh. They have never advanced past the Sweet 16 in the 64 team era. The 10-point victory they eked out today over East Tennessee State hardly instills confidence that this year will be any different. Funny how the same talking heads who last week said it was a good thing that Pitt lost their first game of the Big East tournament due to the rest it would afford them were saying today that Pitt was “rusty” from a long “layoff”. Sounds like Indianapolis Colts excuse-making to me. If you picked Pitt to go all the way, be afraid. Be very afraid.
Look, Mom! I’m on TV! Today’s Choke Artist Award, sponsored by Reggie Miller and Spike Lee, goes to the Tennessee Volunteers. After a game’s worth of back-and-forth with Oklahoma State, the Vols were observed during a timeout waving to family members in the crowd instead of listening to their coach. I loved Bill Raftery’s insightful analysis advice. “Gentlemen, there is no one else here. Get your head in the game!” Missed free throws and missed opportunities doomed the Vols in a two-point squeaker.
Do you believe in Miracles? Yes! Well, almost. Eleven seed Utah State did just about everything but win the game, including sinking a long three at the buzzer to come up one point short. This game provided the best call from the play-by-play man that I have heard so far. “Long three…no…YEESSSS! Banked it in! They love you in Logan, Poo!” (Spoken in reference to a long, ugly, off-balance three-pointer as the shot clock expired by Utah State’s Pooh Williams. He banked it in.) Utah State is the second 11-seed to lose by a single point. (VCU was the other last night.)
A 11-Seed did win, though. Yes, all you boisterous Buckeyes, the Dayton Flyers pulled off the second significant upset of the tournament, upending West Virginia in a game that I didn’t get to watch, but didn’t look like it was ever much in question from what I saw on the Blackberry. If I had been thinking clearly, I would have remembered coach Bob Huggins’ reputation for tournament underachievement.
What is this, Magic vs. Bird? The scoreboard said Bison vs. Jayhawks, but it was really Ben Woodside vs. Sherron Collins. The former had 37 and the latter 32 in a gutsy win for Kansas over a North Dakota State team that gave them a lot more than they wanted. I kept thinking Kansas’ Cole Aldrichwas going to pull a Shaquille O’Neil and tear down the backboard.
Who turned out the lights? Is it just me, or is that gym in Boise really dark? Maybe they are going green in Boise. Of course, if that is the case, they will have to do something about that blue turf in the football stadium. Speaking of football…
What’s up with all the Gator fans? Note to all the folks representing the Gators in their aliases…Tim Tebow does not play basketball. Football season is over. Joakim Noah plays for the Bulls now. Give it a rest.
A Few Awards
Because of my hectic schedule today, I have to be sparing with my midday awards.
The That’s My Girl Award goes to my daughter, Amber Little, who won a prize at school today for being able to name 10 teams in March Madness for her gym teacher. “None of the boys could make it past three,” she told me. It is nice to know that when I am too old to do this anymore, one of my progeny can carry on.
The Going Places Award goes to Brent “Goin” Bolin. So far where he’s goin’ is up in the contest standings. He is currently in sole possession of second place.
The Inquisition Award goes to 12-year-old Braden Murray. Braden and I were both at the church this afternoon for a kids’ Junior Bible Quiz event, and every time he saw me, he asked for an update. What kind of a geek does he think I am? Wait, don’t answer that!
The The Last Shall Be Last Award goes to Nick Nick, the last person to enter the contest, and, ironically, the contestant in last place. By the way, I actually met an Elliott Elliott once, so I am not about to say that it is impossible for Nick Nick to be your real name.
The Nobody’s Perfect Award goes to John Blair, who finally lost a game.
Finally, the Beep! Beep! Whoosh! Award goes to Gaylon “Roadrunner” Taylor, who sprinted to the head of the pack this afternoon on the strength of his 22 wins, best in the contest (shared with 8 others). Gaylon will receive an autographed picture of Wile E. Coyote.
Back to watching basketball. Look for the final Round 1 awards late tonight.