Holy Heartburn, Batman!
Naturally the last two games of the first round had to go into overtime – double overtime, no less – and thus rob me of even more sleep. Boy, were they entertaining, though. This evening’s upsets provided some much needed drama and much expected separation in the contest standings.
Over-ra-ted – Clap your hands and say it with me. Fourth seeded Wake Forest were not upset by Cleveland State; they were obliterated. Seriously, the seeds in this game had to be reversed by mistake. The Horizon League champions made this game so uninteresting that I barely saw two minutes of it. The nine bonus points for this game really moved a lot of people way up the standings, but more on that in a minute. Speaking of uninteresting…
I would rather lick stamps than watch Wisconsin play basketball. Yes, their style is effective. Yes, they play their style well. But, man alive, is it excruciating to watch. Their plodding, methodical style drives run-and-gun teams like Florida State insane. I’m convinced teams lose to Wisconsin just to put themselves out of their own misery. Nevertheless, I am pleased with the outcome, an overtime win for the Badgers. It is one of the two good picks I made in the entire first round.
A heavenly performance was turned in by the Siena Saints, squeaking out a victory over Ohio State in double overtime. I think we ought to dub this year’s tournament the year of the short guy. Seems like every time I turn on the TV, there’s some dude 6 inches shorter than me is doing his best Spud Webb imitation. With a name like Little, that is something I can truly appreciate.
Take me home, country road…Once again, Bob Huggins showed his penchant for leading teams out of the tournament early, as West Virginia was bounced by the ever-popular pick, the Dayton Flyers. If you, ahem, took a flyer on Dayton, I am sure you are pleased with your five bonus points. I hope you choke on them.
Chalk talk – I’ve been watching this thing a long time, and I don’t recall the term “chalk” being used to describe when a favorite wins a game. This year, it seems to be the quip de jour. I am curious as to its derivation, of course. Maybe it is referring to the chalk outline on the ground at the scene of a homicide, since most of the 14-16 seeds got killed (pardon the metaphor) in the first round. (Before you correct me, I said most, not all.) Maybe it is a reference to the chalk LeBron James throws into the air before a game or free throw or TV commercial or whenever it is he goes through that ritual. Maybe it has something to do with Rock Chalk Jayhawk. Maybe “chalk one up for…”? Who knows. I will probably have to email the ever-wise Bryant Gumbel and Seth Davis for the answer.
Winners And Losers
Before I get to the round one awards, now seems like a good time to present this year’s winners and losers.
| Winners | Losers | |
| Announcers | Bill Raftery, Dick Endberg, Gus Johnson, Len Elmore | Jim Nantz, Seth Davis |
| Commercials | Head And Shoulders – The guy says, “Why do cheerleaders have to spell everything? Why are they always telling me to be aggressive one letter at a time? I don’t want to come to the game and read with my ears!” | Axe – Use this deodorant, and beautiful women will line up to smell your armpits. Stupid. And that commercial with the water gushing out of the dude’s armpits is just plain GROSS. |
| Seeds | 1’s, 2’s, 3’s, 4’s, 6’s, 10’s, 12’s | 7’s, 11’s, 13’s, 14’s, 15’s, 16’s |
| Conferences | Big 12, Big East, Pac 10 | ACC, SEC, most Mid-Majors |
| Mascots | Cats, Dogs, Military | Birds, Bears, Ethnic Groups |
| Aliases | “Respect The Drawl, Ya’ll!” | “I’m in it to win it!” (463rd place) |
| Basketball Rules | Appropriate amount of time left on the clock | Traveling…of all kinds…of ANY kind |
| Players | Short, speedy dudes who can shoot | Big, lumbering dudes with a six inch vertical, 10 second 40, and 50% FT percentage for the season |
| Player Hairstyle | Shaggy Mop Top | Shaved head or buzz cut |
And now, for the real winners and losers.
Round One Awards
The Top Prognosticator Award For Day Two goes to Paul Alexander and Ted Badgley who each won 14 games today.
The Maybe You Should Consider Entering Under A Pseudonym Award goes to Kelly Wright who was anything but, losing 11 of 16 games on day 2.
The Thank Heaven For the Repick Round Award goes to the oft-mentioned Bob Hillman, who picked the lower seed to win every game. The good news, Bob, is that you are in 26th place. The bad news is that you can only win one more game without re-picking!
The Geek Of The Week Award goes to Trevis Litherland, Ph.D., whose bracket picking computer program (written by Trevis) has earned him 25th place.
The You Beginner Luck Award goes to Larry “Lanx” Harman, the top rookie in our contest so far. Larry will receive an autographed photo of Pat Morita.
The Whiplash Award goes to Amber “Know nothing about basketball” Sprague, whose rank has gone from 427 all the way up to 26 before settling back down to 66.
The Biggest Loser Award, sponsored by Jerid the Subway guy, goes to Randy Koran, who dropped from 59 to 332, and Lori Boswell, who dropped from 20 to 282. Unlike the reality show, being the biggest loser is not a good thing in our contest.
The I Love This Awesome Scoring System Award goes to Dave “Senor Underdog” Barndt, who has only 18 wins, but 46 upset bonus points (tied for most bonus points in the contest), good enough for 6th place overall.
The I Hate This Stupid Scoring System Award goes to John Weeks, who has a respectable 23-9 record, but only a single upset bonus point.
And finally, the Oh No, Not YOU Again! Award goes to our contest leader, Neal Cunningham, who has won our contest once before in its smaller and humbler. We have never had a repeat champion. Here’s hoping we do not start this year.
Parting Shots
In case you hadn’t noticed by now, I am fascinated by statistical trends in the NCAA Tournament, especially those relating to the seeds irrespective of the teams assigned to them. With that in mind, here are few random observations from round one this year.
The average number of first round upsets is 7. This year we were above average with 10.
At least one 12 seed almost always wins a game. This year, 3 of the 4 did.
14 seeds have gone win-less for the third year in a row.
Maybe 7 isn’t so lucky after all. 7 seeds lost 3 out of 4 games this year.
A hearty congratulations to those of you in the top 10, and good luck to the rest of us. The upcoming has the very real potential for at least one scategories bonus to be won. Stay tuned!